THIS IS THE WAY
by GRIMMANGELL
Summary: If the world were beautiful...I wouldn't need to exist. None of us would. It doesn't matter anymore what would have happened...All that matters is that we're losing to KIRA's game. And if we can't win the game..."We're nothing but losers set in their ways."
1. THIS IS THE DAY

_**"Is it better for a man to have chosen EVIL**__**, than to have GOOD imposed upon him?**_" - Anthony Burgess

My mother would have said that this was bound to happen, if she were still alive and anything like my aunt - I was smart -no one knew what my IQ was -, lovely in a dark sort of way - I thought it more abstract; if you looked at me directly in the mirror, my imperfections were glaringly evident - and above all 'bold'.

Some called me 'suicidal bitch'.

Others called me 'a walking dead woman'.

Me?

I just called myself determined. And willing to lose my life.

For one thing, my one vendetta, the one person I wanted lying dead at my feet.

Numbers

[16, 18, 9 & 26]


	2. THIS IS THE DAY II

"_**Hate looks just like everyone else until it **__**smiles**__**..**_" - Tahereh Mafi.

At the moment I was born, everyone probably knew that I was pretty odd. White hair, mismatched eyes, didn't cry, just looked at everyone and scowled. It was like I already knew what this world had done to my mother.

My mother.

The faceless specter who committed 'suicide' three days after my 8th birthday while clutching my name in a note.

Only I knew the code and what it meant...My actual name.

Dawn Breanmanin.

Or as most people call me: Day Break.

Neither of them appear on my ID chip, instead Yue Kira Hatsune shows up.

And no one is ever the wiser.

But that was three years ago. I've taken my soma - the drugs that 'effectively' eliminate my emotion management issues.

I call out to my aunt that I'm leaving and step right into him.

Almost a darker shade of white that looks like grey, darker grayish black eyes and an almost calming demeanor.

Except for one thing...He was a boy and I was a girl.

His gender overpowered me and my gender's freedom every time they took a breath.

And that meant that I hated him, hated that whatever he asked for, I had to do it.

Or my life and everyone who knows or knew me's lives were in danger every 40 seconds.

I bow lowly without watching his face.

And swallow down my revulsion before kissing his cheek.

"Umm..."

I leave for my treehouse without looking back.

"My name is Near!"

I stop and raise an eyebrow at him.

"You're not from here, are you?"

"Is that a bad thing?"

"Well,shit...I guess I'll hang out with you until you get corrupted. Watashi wa Day."

"Umm...I'm from America...So I have no idea what you just said.."

"Figures. Huh. Well, I said 'My name was Day.' Why would you move-"

"It's You!"

Thank god, it's that idiot girl who thinks I was afraid of her.

I can kick her ass without repercussions because she's no longer 'useful' this week.

Stupid Mother Nature.

"Come at me, ijinowarui buta!"

"What was that, baka?!"

"You sound like an annoying bitchy pig!"

"You look like an idiot!"

"Come up with a new retort, shōfu!"

"How am I a whore? I've only slept with 13 guys!"

I facepalm at that. Seriously? Does she not know what the word 'whore' meant?! Why even go to school then?!

"Oi! At least, I go to school!"

Did I say that out loud? Oh well.

"At least every time I throw up, I don't have to be afraid that I'm pregnant."

"At least my child wouldn't have to watch me commit suicide!"

That's it.

There's going to be one less whoring bitch in boarding school today.

I smile. Almost immediately, she cringes away from me as I step closer.

"Care to repeat that?"

I'm a bit closer to snapping. C'mon, you can't tease my anger like that and then run.

You gotta have your cake, honey.

"Your mother fucked you up!"

I tilt my head slightly and my grin widens.

As my fist smashes into her face.

"...Such a pretty color~."

Her eyes widen and she squeaks out,

"Freak!"

Before scurrying off to cry to her 'boyfriend'.

I glance back at the boy behind me.

"Well, I'm guessing that's never happened in Suburbia? Oh and I am clinically insane...With anger management issues."

A/N:

L is still alive - He's Day's uncle.

The quotes that appear in bold before each chapter is from a dystopian novel. This chapter's came from the first book of the Shatter Me series and the last chapter's came from Clockwork Orange.

Women have become nothing more than breeding weapons. Literally.

A Writer is a woman who was deemed a 'fighter' - meaning at the age of 13, she exhibited a will to fight against Kira's regime or man who wanted to join.

Kira's 'Justice' hasn't spread all the way since in my AU - It was a completely different task force that took on the Kira case.

The reason I'm writing this is because I'm fucked up and this would be a fucked up way to show how lucky we are the KIRA regime got ended when it did.

And as to the title's quote:

"THIS IS THE WAY the world ends; not with a bang but a whimper..."

(If someone comes crying to me later that the characters are OOC, I will laugh mercilessly at you and your stupidity.

1) Near only appears towards the end three episodes...So character details? Zilch.

2) This is an alternate universe, dumbass! The world is turning into the Hunger Games mixed with Slender Man crossed with a teenager's fucked mind! Of course, Asane-chan is going to be the cynical aunt who has given up on life!


	3. NEAR THE WAY

"**That's** **how we stay young these days: ****murder**** and ****suicide."**

-Eugène Lonesco

I look at Day quizzically for a moment before she grins,

"Fine. I'm not insane, I just have a problem with anxiety and anger...So...Why did your family move here again?"

She deflects the topic back at me and the grin disappears behind the blank faced girl who kissed my cheek earlier.

Curious...

"Something about my dad having-"

"Business, here?"

"Yeah-"

"Three weeks tops?"

"Yea-"

"I wouldn't believe that if I were you. My dad said the damn same thing about America and I haven't seen him since I was four."

I can't tell whether she's being bitter or matter of fact.

"Why are you so nonchalant about-"

"Because of that."

She points at a window that shows two people arguing.

They're obviously married because the woman holds a child.

A barely month old child.

As the fighting escalates and the child wails plaintively, I slowly look around.

Everyone around us is watching, no, whispering like this is a movie.

I'm about to open my mouth to say something.

"Near,don't."

Something in her tone brooks no argument to what she says next,

"These people do this all the time. And will not hesitate to get you killed if you oppose them publicly."

I look back at the window saying nothing as the woman is pressed against the window.

"This might be the day."

"The day he kills her."

"What about the children?"

"The boy or the girl?"

"The boy, of course, the girl can rot in hell for all I care."

"I'll probably take her in."

Whispers surround us, pressing closer as the man begins to strangle his wife.

"Why is he doing that?!"

I whisper furiously, spitting the poison out into the air.

"She tries to fight it too obviously. I'm rooting for her to fight, to win but even in my useless optimism, I don't want to die myself, so I just watch and pray that she'll be alright."

I look at her in surprise.

"You haven't figured it out, yet? Women in Japan are useless, pretty things to listen to, watch and fuck."

The window swings open with resolute crack and I watch Day's one silver eye cloud over.

The man carries the baby - it's now obvious it's a baby girl - to the window and drops her.

Day moves instinctively catching the child from death.

Like...She does this everyday.

"Better catch than last time, Day!"

She nods silently, rocking the child and singing softly to it as the fear of falling subsides from her heart and is replaced with fatigue.

Day comes back to my side as the man starts shooting at the grass, re-waking the baby and its wails.

This time Day doesn't even glance at the child as her mother keens, shrieking,

"Stop, you might hit her again!"

"It'll probably teach you a listen on how to warm dinner properly!"

"I'm sorry! Please! Don't kill her!"

In response, the man strangles her again, lifting her out the window.

"G-g-gomenasai, masūta..."

"Anata wa yurusa re, Yukimono."

"H-h-hai..."

Day's eyes both glaze over now and she simply sighs as the woman stops breathing.

"She's finally free...Tsumari, jiyū kakaku ga."

I narrow my eyes at her. What did she mean?

"Japan has meant slavery for women for so many years now, that the only way to escape..."

She gets closer to the shell of my ear and whispers,

"Is to commit suicide or get murdered."

She says it with utter seriousness.

Just as the man starts to scream, just now realizing that he killed the woman he married,

"So young."

"Only 16?"

"How sad..."

"Kira will avenge her..."

"Yes...Kira will kill him too..."

"NO! YUKIMONO! YUKI, DON'T DO THIS! PLEASE!"

Day's eyes harden as she hands the baby to me.

The warmth is unfamiliar since I am an only child.

The screams suddenly stop and the man's eyes glaze over.

He starts toward the open window and I turn away with the child but Day keeps watching.

Never blinking, never wavering, like she wants to engrave this to her memory.

There's a sick thump and then Day looks at the crowd and a little girl brings a shovel and a guitar.

"On this ground, I lay motionless, in pain.."

I stare for a moment at the familiarity of the song as everyone gathers to spit on the corpses.

And Day simply begins to dig two separate graves, dragging their corpses to them while singing in her high alto voice.

"Such a grim little thing..."

"Odd too..What with those witch's eyes in her head..."

"Some say she's as cracked as her mother..."

"A Songstress? At her age?"

"Her aunt's a drunkard Whore..."

"Is this all a dream?...Was it all too much or just not enough?...Wake me up! I'm living a nightmare!"

Day's voice reaches across the din and suddenly they all remember that two people died.

Grabbing handfuls of dirt and non-the-less carefully, throwing it on the corpses' faces, the group of people wander back home.

"I will not die! I will survive! I'll wait here for you...In my time of dying. I feel alive-"

I've heard this song before now I'm certain of it.

"With you besides me.."

Day nods and we both cover the corpses in dirt.

"In my time of dying..."

Kneeling down by them, she whispers something I can't understand, like she's asking them to stay dead.

"Day?"

"Hmm?"

"What's wrong with this town?"

"More things than you can count...But I'll show you around. And try to explain that this is what Japan has turned into now."

"But...What is this?"

"It's the end of the peace. It's already been the apocalypse for awhile now..."


	4. THIS IS THE DAY III

"**All revolutions start as the sheerest fantasies until they happen, then they become historical ****inevitabilities..."**** - David Mitchell**

I walk two steps behind Near, looking down at my hands.

Black dirt and bloodstains envelop my small hands.

'What a grim child...'

They would have thought me much grimmer if they knew that I had seen these exact events in my nightmares.

'What with those witch eyes in her head...'

One silver and one black...

Coupled with my...

Curses...

I had more than just 'witch eyes' and not even I understood it...Did I expect such ignorant people to understand also?

"..Day!"

I blink twice and look around. And as I come back to my senses, I gasp.

There's a stone version of myself with skeletal hands ripping at my chest and skirts.

And that's exactly what I'm hallucinating about right now.

My eyes must look wild since two hands grip my shoulders and shake me back into reality.

The stone statue crumbles as the skeletal hands disappear.

I look to see Near was nowhere close to me and in fact, he had wandered into a neighborhood goon.

"Huh?"

I resist the urge to smack my forehead.

Are all Americans seriously this illiterate?

"I said give me-"

I'm so going to regret this..But I think Goons 1 and 2 are about to kill him.

"Let go of my-"

Swallow...

It...

Down..

"Husband!"

I sprint towards Near.

He looks slightly confused.

I mentally roll my eyes.

"Are you alright?"

I look at him with half-manufactured concern...After all, I felt obligated to at least get him through seeing the town uninjured.

"Yes...Wife?"

The way he was acting was going to blow our cover.

"What's the big deal, huh?! My husband just-"

Oh fuck...I actually know one of the goons...This could be a problem.

Lucky for me, we're actually sort of friends.

I tilt my chin towards Near and make pleading eyes.

"You'll need to pay for him then. 15 and 15 yen."

"Hai."

I mentally frown at Jayden before handing him the money.

He had said he'd quit before someone got hurt.

"Don't let us collect that favor you owe, Yue!"

"Hmm..."

I watch as they all walk away from us.

"If I hadn't said you were my husband, I'd have to just watch them beat you to death and cremate your body."

"But-"

"Kira can't catch what people don't report...And my aunt owes each of their families a debt. Of 10,000,000 yen collectively."

Near's eyes widen as I give him a hand up.

"Let's get started on this tour."

"O-okay."

"I don't bite much. Only if you asked."

I try a feeble attempt at a joke but Near's eyes only widen further.

"That was a horrible joke. Gomen'nasai."

I bow lowly. Near doesn't relax very much and he shakes his head, closing his eyes.

I press my hand against his head, checking for a temperature the way I've seen most American parents do, hoping at least that would calm him down.

It works and I sigh from relief.

My aunt's temper has already gotten us enough fines this month.

"Umm...Day? Where are we?"

I smirk and motion for him to follow me.

I had taken him to my job - if he was rich, he wouldn't care much but if he was poor, this was the best place to find work.

I swipe my exposed wrist against the bar coder and drag Near after me.

"I had to do that...So the doors wouldn't shut you out."

I explain without looking at him.

"What is this place?"

He breathes out as he takes the place in.

The black and red color scheme is a bit disconcerting during the day if you're unused to the eccentricity...But that wasn't what he was staring at.

The poles, the Song-Oh.

Oh...I guess we should've started out a bit from the beginning instead of the heart of it.

I grab his hand gently and guide him to the dining area because from the way things look...He'll probably faint from the shock of whatever he's shocked about if I leave him alone.

"W-what's wrong with this place?!"

"How do you mean?"

"That lady was on a pole and playing the piano at the same time wearing nothing but some ribbons!"

"It's harder than it looks. I-"

"Wait! Wait, you speak from experience?!"

"As soon as you hit 10, you are good to find a job as Songstress or Whore if you can't sing or write and are that desperate. We needed the money."

I meet his eyes head on and raise a challenging eyebrow to the pity in his eyes.

"What about your aunt?"

"She's becoming to old to be a whore anymore and she can't sing very much ..or very good..." "I heard them say she was a drunkard.."

I narrow my eyes at that statement. I needed to crack some heads together.

"Do you believe everything you hear?"

"It isn't true?"

He sounded hopeful.

Strange...

"I never said that nor did I imply it. I just asked do you believe everything that you hear?"

"No.."

"You sound unsure. Do you believe what your mother and father tell you? Do you believe your president? Do you believe me? The problem with Japan right now is that we were too late in our suspicions."

"And you think Kira's going to take advantage of America?"

I grab his arm before he can push open the door.

"Don't."

"Why not!"

I think he's sick of my bluntness but honestly!

I cover my eyes and Near screams out frantic apologies.

I snicker lightly at his tomato red face.

"I did warn you."

"...Shut up."

"I did the same thing when I went home early one day...Except I was under the bed."

"The one they were..."

"Yep. Fifth most traumatic experience in my life especially since it was when she first got her job. She had begged him not to."

I shrug off the memory of my six year old self vowing to protect my aunt from tears ever again.

So far I had been doing a pretty decent job.

Except on the anniversaries.

Those were the exceptions when we both acted like we weren't used to pain and numbness that living this unwanted life brought.

"Oh...I'm gome-sai."

"What?"

"Gom-say?"

"Go-men-na-s-I."

"Gomen'nasai..I'm-"

"Gomen'nasai, it already means 'I'm sorry'."

I change the topic, I didn't understand how he was looking at me.

"I brought us here because other than the whole 'find-a-job-factor', it also is a restuarant. In fact, it's the only decent one both men and women can enter without the woman getting collared without a husband. The rest tastes and looks like vomit. Stupid robo-cooks.."

At this point, I'm rambling.

And I hate it.

I only got like this with my uncle Ryuuzaki.

He was the only person after oba-chan that I was truly worried about.

Not obligation.

Just trust.

Not even familiar love existed at this point...

Not since him-

"Dawn? Dawn! Let go of the table!"

My mother's voice!

I look up expectantly but am startled to meet the gaze of my Sensei.

"Gomen'nasai..."

I bow lowly, cracking my head against the cool oak.

Praying for relief.

My mind had cracked again and I hadn't noticed us walking to a table.

Splinter and blood stain my hands again and I blink stupidly.

"What did you just call me?"

"Day, what else?"

I narrow my eyes and raise an eyebrow.

"D-Day-chan?"

He winced like I would tell him off.

"Where did you learn honorifics?"

"Manga and anime..."

"If you say Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt...I may have to personally kill you myself."

"What! NO! Just Soul Eater and Shingenki no Kyojin! GOD!"

"Good job on learning so fast, Near-kun!"

I find that if I compliment boys...They run away.

"How old are you?"

"15?"

Why hadn't he left yet?

I try futilely to analyze him but he's like damn anagrams!

Why couldn't he be written in binary?!

And I'm talking in code yet again...Sigh, at least the ramen is here!

"Aren't you going to wash your hands?"

Am I EATING with my HANDS currently?! So yeah...

"No..."

I crack my chopsticks and mutter a small prayer to whatever gods are still holding on to a little faith in humanity.

"Āmen.."

I dig in indifferent to whether he decides to eat or not.

In no time at all, I get a text.

"Naze?! Naze? Gomen, Near-kun! Do you now how to go home on your own?! No, of course not! Let's go! No, no, we don't have time for that!"

My aunt...

My aunt!

MY AUNT!

Every thought of what they could be doing to here to make Jayden text me those two words: "Himei. Obieta."

Screams. Terrified.

My aunt was in our house screaming terrified.

It just fueled it.

And it wanted out...Now!

No!

Now!

Wait, Near!

I deposit him in front of a house he seemed to have confirmed was his.

But I'm already lost...

I'm clenching my fists so hard more blood stains me.

I kick the door open, its never locked, and smirk.

"Hello~. Do you want to play?"

Immediately they look at me, I wrap my hand around the closet's windpipe.

The way they were looking at me...Where was she?!

How dare they?!

She was my family!

No one was allowed to touch her but family!

I smash the man through our desk.

And regard the men, coolly looking at them all.

"Now gentlemen, where have you hidden my aunt?"

•••

AUTHOR'S NOTE

•••

Alright so obviously Day's a teensy-winsey bit cracked. But as this is practice for PUPPET and a psychological twister, expect it! I mean a world taken over by Kira is fucked anyway and then add to stuff she witness happening to her neighbors, parents and aunt, you can't expect the poor kid NOT to be a bit cracked. As for Near, I making him out to be nervous around Day and everyone else for a reason, okay! He wasn't exactly raised in Japan as I see it and I get I haven't been describing either of them at ALL and I'll get to it...Starting next chapter...When inspiration hits how exactly I'm going to make Near's parents decide that hearing screaming is a PERFECT time to go and greet the NEIGHBORS!

Cough *Day* Cough (PS. I KNOW THIS CHAPTER SUCKS)


	5. NEAR THE WAY II

"Believe nothing others tell you...That was the number one rule...But what if the ones who set the rules are lying too?...Who do you believe when there is nobody left believe?" - Lisa Alfonso

I look blankly at my hand.

Why had she been so worried?

I mean I might have just met her...Not even four hours ago...but still the information I had gathered said she shouldn't get that easily freaked.

Maybe her insane comment was a half-truth?

Maybe I was just imagining things?

God knows it happens too much already...

"ARGHHHHHHGGHGHH!"

All the hair stands up on my head when Day's voice echoes back.

'These people do this all the time...They will NOT hesitate to kill you.'

Damn it!

I look at the house where the screams obviously come from.

The door was hanging off the hinges.

The window was broken.

There was a hand laying outside the door.

I back away from the sight before banging into my mother.

"Mum!"

"Ne-Near! How was your exploration, dear?"

"Great. Fine. Made lots of observations. Love you! By-"

Displaying her usual odd bursts of strength around me is normal although where she's looking could spell trouble for me.

The house.

"Let's go help!"

My mum...

Ever so psychotic in her endeavors to make new friends

...I can't say I share her sentiment.

Girls seem to bore me...Except for...Interestingly enough, Day.

I shrug and follow my mum to our probable death's.

•••

Like I said, my mum is psychotic.

I just wasn't aware HOW psychotic...

We - I mean me with my mother's blackmail - open the door to greeted with complete and utter massacre.

Scratch that, we walked INTO a bloody massacre!

Day was crouching like a wounded, caged animal protecting a petite blond with sad, dead blue eyes.

And the scariest part; for the first time I'd seen her she looked terrifying.

One of the men makes a grab at the blond but Day slowly crunches his fingers.

"D-Day?! What are yo-"

Without warning, she snarls at me without once leaving her defensive position or letting the man's fingers escape.

I back up holding up my hands in defeat.

"C'mon mum...Let's go home. Now."

Despite the fact that the whole place looks like a hacker factory, my mother is all smiles.

"Hi! What're your names?"

"Misa Asane."

"Grrrrrmmm."

I'd heard about this apparently, multiple personality disorder.

Insults turn into that personality's name?

"Hi Grimm, Asane-chan? Sama? No honorific?"

The second my mom says that, yet another man leaps from the floor.

Day (Grimm?) readies herself but not against the swing that leaves her right hand useless with a hatchet ax.

She just stares deadly at him before blinking slowly.

And grabs his wrist in her petite form and hauls him into the air.

He lands on the table with a sickening crack and goes still.

Grimm smiles and the last man tries to get away, clutching his hand to his head hoping to stop the stream of blood steadily flowing from his head.

Grimm picks him up and smashes his head through the broken shards of the window.

"P-please! S-she's just going to keep dragging you down. She's-"

Throughout the whole time he had been talking, Grimm had been looking for something. And apparently she'd found it: a syringe.

"I believe you dropped this? And let's see whether or not it was damaged, shall we?"

Before the man can blink, the clear liquid is already pumping through his veins.

"How does it feel? Does it feel like it's helping you? Does it feel good?"

The man is howling and screaming from the pain. But Grimm isn't done yet.

She moves quickly in snapping his neck.

"ARGGH-"

The man lets out a watery sounding death scream but Grimm remains unmoved.

"...Day..."

The blonde speaks shyly and Grimm looks at her.

"Calm down. They aren't going to kill me too. It's okay. I'm okay. Arigato, watashi no musume."

Grimm nods once before looking dazed.

"Day? Are you back to us yet?"

"Hnn."

She falls into her aunt's arms gently and starts to sleep.

"D-does this happen a lot?"

Her aunt looks at me once and then at Day.

"Yes. Many of these town people think that people like me - people who wish for freedom and can't accept this reality and want to escape somewhat - are dead we-"

Day narrows her eyes at me and then removes her hand from her aunt's mouth.

"Oba...ANATA GA JICHŌDE WA ARIMASEN!"

"Son'na koto shitteru."

"Naze?!"

"Watashi wa mada hitobito ga iukutowokiku."

Day starts breathing heavily.

And as soon as she moves to get up,

"No! I already have seen what you do to people who say such things! Please don't."

"I can make sure they live long enough to suffer."

My eyes widen at that.

Was this the same girl who faked being my wife to prevent my getting injured?

She seemed more than willing to risk Kira's wrath.

Day slams the door and screams angrily once she's outside.

"Day..."

Misa starts to cry sadly.

"I'm sorry, miss. But why is she like that?"

"W-we didn't know that all of our family getting murdered would affect her like this. And after I went into depression, all the duties went to her."

"So you think it's stress?"

"Hai."

"Where do you think she's gone?"

"Near?"

"I'm going to go and get her."

"B-be careful...She doesn't see you as a friend despite how she might act. She does it out of obligations to her deceased brother."

I don't know why but that comment burns.

It must have shown on my face since the aunt narrows her eyes.

"You really aren't from around here. Be careful...You might not even make it to my niece!"

•••

After she had given me the 'possible' locations of where Day might have run off to, I left her aunt and went on a find Day hunt.

Place #1:

"Hey! Do you know where Tawagato is?"

When did that question hold the ability to nearly get me killed?!

After I run away from yet another person trying to kill me, I bump into one of the guys who tried to rob me from earlier.

Literally.

"Hi."

I raise an eyebrow.

"Um...I know you're this week's pet project but I need my version of Day back. This nice one can't help me like she can. I'll let you have her for the rest of the week."

"I'm actually trying to find her right now. Do you know where Tawagato is?"

I say blankly, swallowing the urge to ask him even more questions.

Questions that might just make him want to kill me even more.

"Why?!"

Immediately a gun is pressed to my forehead.

"Her aunt said she'd be there!"

The gun lowers and he takes off running.

"What's wrong with it?!"

"Those are people who don't give a damn about anyone's lives! They'll kill Day in a heartbeat!"

I think back to Day's actions in her house and quietly whisper.

"I don't think it'll be that easy."

And I was right.

Soon we came to a skidding halt in front of dilapidated warehouse.

'The shit' is graffitied everywhere in sight.

And along with the sound of gunfire, it gives it a more surreal feeling.

"Come on! Day's in there!"

She wasn't.

Not anymore.

Instead in bloody crimson, she had written.

'THIS IS ONLY THE BEGINNING. YOU HAVE ALL FAILED.'

And lined up, seemingly according to color, she had placed heads.

Jayden, as he had told me his name on the way here, vomits in the corner.

And my eyes widen at the sight of Day smiling...As a six year old.

As the hallucination plays out, I look for the real Day to no avail.

Place #4

Asking the same about 'Jigoku no Gake' was just as deadly and resulted in my nearly getting decapitated and for once Jayden didn't know why.

"What is wrong with this town?! Asking a simple question is now fatal to my health!?"

I scream as we flee from yet another man trying to kill us.

A cloaked figure trips both of us sending Jayden nearly sprawling over a garbage can.

"That place is haunted by Oni. It's cursed. I know of only one person who isn't afraid of it. Are you looking for Gravedigger?"

"Do you mean Day?"

"Hai. Come with me."

"Wait, who are you?"

Jayden stops me from following her.

"Shadow. I'm what Day calls a 'friend'."

It takes us five minutes to get to an obsidian sand beach with a cliff with white sand.

Almost immediately, I get the strangest sensation...Like I'd been here before.

Jayden immediately goes over and vomits again.

"Anno...You have a weak stomach, ne?"

"H-Sure."

He responds before retching again.

"Then only the newbie should go. The stuff some people see will make you sick."

Shadow grabs my hand and pushes me up the cliff.

"What is that?!"

A person being hanged appears over the cliff.

And it's my mother!

"It's not real. None of it is."

My father holding a gun to his head isn't real?

That's why this place is 'cursed'.

Hallucinations.

"Some people think it's real. Especially since sometimes the deaths actually happen."

"What do you mean by that?!"

Shadow doesn't answer but points at the white haired figure on the edge of the cliff.

"This is where I got cursed."

"What do you mean?"

"I can see when people die. And I'm very sure that you know what I mean."

"I thought only Shinigami could do that."

"And those who make the deal."

"You made the deal."

"My mother and I. We both did."

"Why?"

"Shadow is a Shinigami. And yet you and Jayden can see her. Why do you think that is?"

Is she implying-

"Everyone has made the deal. And you've been here before...They've just wiped most of our memories."

"Who?"

"Who do you think?"

She looks at me with pain in her eyes.

"Our family isn't who they say they are. The government is paying doubles. Everything you think you know is falsities, N."

"N?"

"You honestly can't remember us,can you?"

As she says that, my world starts to go blurry.

"You were helping us fight against Kira. Remember that at least. Remember who you are. This pansy side of you is starting to annoy me."


	6. THIS IS THE DAY IV

"That was when they suspended the Constitution. They said it would only be temporary. There wasn't even any rioting in the streets. There was no enemy you could point a finger at."

- Margaret Atwood

I sit on the edge of the cliff as he starts to flashback. I speak and struggle to remember to nothing but myself.

•••••3 YEARS AGO•••••

I hated all of them. Asswipes.

Why couldn't they see that Kira is WRONG!

He wasn't a god!

He was just a crazed serial killer.

With a thing for degrading women.

I shake out my sopping wet fedora as I step into the apartment.

"Damn! N! Achoo!"

"Day?"

"Achoo! WHA-choo!"

Near looks at me with a raised eyebrow which after many childhood years I can see means, "What the hell happened to you?"

"...I hate Kira groupies..."

"Puddle?"

"Add an 's' and you have my whole morning. How about you, hermit?"

"That's offensive."

I sag onto the couch.

"Yeah...To hermits. That can't figure out anagrams. Ugh...I take it back."

Near smirks lightly at me.

"Like my prototype?"

"...I might marry you."

"I thought you wanted to be the next Artermis."

"I still-"

I cut myself off at the sound of knocking. Near, as typical to him, continues building his match tower.

"SPK! WE KNOW YOU ARE IN THERE! OPEN UP! NEAR AND DAY OPEN UP! YOU'RE THE LAST ONES LEFT!"

Near locks eyes with me and as the door shatters hands me a match. I strike it and drop it near the tower.

••••TWO YEARS AGO••••

"Dawn Brenmanin! You are public enemy number two what-"

"That is an HONOUR. I mean I get the five-star hotel, pretty uniform-"

A hand cracks over my smirking face.

And I let out a bitter laugh. I had been here for a year now. And the only thing 'five-star' about this place was how thick the walls were.

I should know better than anyone - given they liked smashing my face into it.

I had always been sarcastic and uncouth but if I ever had been in a situation where my own wit was going to drive me insane-

"Don't interrupt, maggoted worm!"

"That would be redundant. Given that maggots ARE worms and the word maggoted seems to be in no one's lexicon but your own."

-It would be this one.

They bring him back in and leave him to his work.

"Not such a chatterbox since last time?"

I bite my cheek as he brings out his scissors.

And shoves it into my ribs.

"They say they won't need me soon."

As I lose conciosness, I pray fleetingly for Near to be dead.

Just as the familiar blanket of darkness is ripped away, a burst of pain is ripped through my chest.

Palpitations.

Heart murmurs.

Irregular heart beats.

"Gah!"

"Finally! Scream for me, canary!"

Sadistic bastard.

It takes all my strength but I still raise my head.

"Ahhh...Is that good enough?"

Kill me now while I can still call myself loyal.

Please.

I want to die.

"...You must want to die pretty badly."

My cloaked inmate murmurs quietly after they dump me in my cell.

"I do."

I look at my trembling hands.

My heart is still as frail as it used to be.

And all this 'stress' is killing me.

Just not fast enough.

I can barely pick up my cup, much less drink from it.

"Why?"

"I'm sorry?"

"You could escape."

"Why? So they could-"

A wave of pain hits me so hard that I see white.

"Day!"

I cough up blood.

"N-n-n-"

The world starts spinning but I have to do something.

"Sy is still o-o-o"

Orange.

Syringe.

Kills.

I'm sorry.

I was too weak for this new world.

••THIRTEEN MONTHS AGO••

Cold water is splashed on me.

"..."

I open my eyes for the first time in over three months and moan.

"Good job. You broke him. He was nearly begging us for this baby!"

No!

I struggle to lift my head but barely manage an inch.

"Ne-ah."

"Awww...The resurrected canary's first word is a little boy who doesn't know her anymore."

"Whh."

"Why? You both would be VERY helpful to Kira's cause."

"Bistrdsss.."

"Very soon, you will be too."

I slowly gather all my strength and spit on the man holding the clear syringe.

"Too bad. I would have had fun with you."

He drags his heavy hand across my breasts and I cringe away from him.

Too bad I can't kill all of-

The needle prick was so insignificant yet so final.

I had nothing to grab onto except a name...

A name...

Misa Asane.

Kira's former lover.

And the only member of my family left.

Other than 'Uncle Ryuuzaki' but no one knew who the hell he was OR where.

Maybe...

Mayb..

May..

Ma..

M..

Misa.

Oba Misa.

•••NINE MONTHS AGO•••

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!"

"Dawn, calm down!"

"HOW THE FUCK DO YOU KNOW THAT NAME?!"

The black haired man puts his hands up as Misa and I brandish weapons.

"You know me."

L.

The consonant appears in my head unbidden.

"Get out."

SPK.

"Why?"

"Your people might help us but we're just civilians!"

"Really?"

This 'L' fellow was really irritating! I mean I tell him 'get out' and he sits back down and eats my cake!

My cake!

At least, he didn't knock down-

Knock down what?

"Get out because I'm not going back into the insane asylum!"

I narrow my eyes at the syringe he brings out.

"What is that?"

"Misa, please."

"Gomen."

"Let go! Let go! Misa! Let go!"

"I hope you remember how hard ass you act right now. It's probably for the best Near never sees this."

Tears show up in my eyes and I squirm all the more.

The syringe slips into my arterial pulse at my wrist.

There is no way to describe how much pain there is in remembering 18 years of your life.

"Can you tell me your name?"

"I'm Day!"

The white haired boy lets go of his mother's fingers and presses a kiss to my cheek.

"I'm Near."

•••••••••••••••••

"Welcome to Wammy's House!"

"Excuse me! My friend has arrhythmia and stress makes it worse."

I clutch Near's sleeve as the people start to stare and gawk at me.

He glares at them for me and I smile.

He was hero and I was going to do everything in my power to become his shield!

•••••••••••••••••

Near squeezes my fingers so tightly they go pale.

"Come on! I can't just stay here! I have to-"

"Let's run away together."

He looks so lost...

"If...If I don't, there soon WON'T be a place we can run to."

I let go of his fingers and press a kiss to the corner of his mouth by mistake.

"I missed.."

"Yeah.."

"L?"

Our mentors look at us from under the cover of their umbrellas.

"Protect him. Or I'll hide every slice of cake in existence."

I lift up my face to the rain and jump after the other SPK members.

•••••••••••••••••

Nothing...In between, those gaps in my false memory.

"Near?"

I look at the spot he was in before and sadly allow tears to track my face.

In dirt;

"I'm sorry but if we used to be partners or friends...We can't anymore..."

"Why?"

"For your sake and mine."

"Why?"

"For your sake...And mine."

"Am I still not strong enough? And he didn't allow me to-"

A blunt object hits the back of my head and darkness waves over me.


	7. NEAR THE WAY III

"Only the sweetest of the sweet would bring brownies to the apocalypse."

-Shelly Crane

ᴛʜɪs ᴡʜᴏʟᴇ ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ᴇxᴘʟᴀɪɴs ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʜᴀᴘᴘᴇɴᴇᴅ ʙᴇᴛᴡᴇᴇɴ ɴᴇᴀʀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴅᴀʏ. ᴅᴀʏ ɪsɴ'ᴛ...ᴡᴇʟʟ..sʜᴇ ɪsɴ'ᴛ ᴇxᴀᴄᴛʟʏ...ɴᴏʀᴍᴀʟ. ᴘᴇʀ sᴇ. ʜᴇʀ ʙᴀᴄᴋsᴛᴏʀʏ ɪs ᴀ ᴊᴜᴍʙʟᴇᴅ ᴄᴏʟʟᴇᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ᴏғ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴛᴏʟᴅ ʜᴇʀ. sᴏ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡʜᴏʟᴇ 'ɴᴇᴀʀ ᴡᴀʟᴋᴇᴅ ᴀᴡᴀʏ ғʀᴏᴍ ʜɪs ᴍᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴋɪssᴇs ʜᴇʀ ᴄʜᴇᴇᴋ' ᴄʟɪᴄʜᴇ...ᴄᴜᴛᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀᴅᴏʀᴀʙʟᴇ ʙᴜᴛ ɴᴏᴘᴇ! ʜᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴀᴄᴛᴜᴀʟʟʏ ᴍᴇᴇᴛ ɪsɴ'ᴛ ᴍᴏᴠɪᴇ ʀᴏᴍᴀɴᴄᴇ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀᴛ ᴀʟʟ! sᴏ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ɢᴇᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʜᴏᴘᴇs ᴜᴘ. ᴀɴᴅ ᴀs ᴀ ʀᴇsᴜʟᴛ, ɴᴏ ᴏɴᴇ ᴋɴᴏᴡs ʜᴇʀ ʀᴇᴀʟ ɴᴀᴍᴇ.

ᴏʜ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴏsᴇ ᴏғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡʜᴏ ғʟɪɴᴄʜ ᴀᴛ ɢʀᴀᴘʜɪᴄ sᴄᴇɴᴇs ɪɴᴠᴏʟᴠɪɴɢ sᴡᴇᴀʀɪɴɢ, ʙʟᴏᴏᴅ, ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀ ᴅᴇᴀᴛʜ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏsᴛ ᴛʀᴀᴜᴍᴀᴛɪᴄ ᴡᴀʏ ɪ ᴄᴀɴ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ᴏғ...ʏᴏᴜ ᴡɪʟʟ ʙᴇ ᴜᴛᴛᴇʀʟʏ ᴄᴏɴғᴜsᴇᴅ ʙᴜᴛ ʟᴇss ǫᴜᴇᴀsʏ ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ sᴋɪᴘ ɪᴛ. sᴏ sɪᴛ ʙᴀᴄᴋ, ʟɪsᴛᴇɴ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘʟᴀʏʟɪsᴛ ᴀɴᴅ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴀᴛᴇᴅ-ʀ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ. (And the probably illegal font use. And this chapter has been re-,re-written several times and currently will be third person as Near.)

J⃒U⃒S⃒T⃒ Y⃒O⃒U⃒R⃒ N⃒O⃒T⃒-⃒S⃒O⃒-⃒F⃒R⃒I⃒E⃒N⃒D⃒L⃒Y⃒,⃒

G⃒R⃒I⃒M⃒M⃒W⃒R⃒I⃒T⃒E⃒R⃒

All Near knew was that he hated this place. Hated the stench of helplessness mixed with death mixed with vomit. Hated the cold calculation of the nurses and doctors as they administered shock therapy. Hated the pleading in the eyes of fully grown men. The whimpering.

His fingers twitch to life as Mello comes to a stop in front of their destination.

Room AS17.

Home to the 'Necromancer'.

The very last resort of a person that could help them take down Kira.

Understandably Mello was nervous; a woman had thrown herself at him begging to be saved from this place just seconds before being brutally tackled by guards but this wasn't the time.

Near takes the initiative and bracing himself, pushes the door open.

In the center of the pure white room lies a clear cage and within that cage lies a girl.

An extremely pale, petite, slender girl with a blindfold covering a third of her face and a straitjacket that goes below her knees.

"Mr. River, I suggest you close your mouth. You'll get a dry throat."

A higher pitch of monotone alto sounds from within the cage as the girl clears her throat and shakes her pure alabaster hair from her face.

Mello snickers at Near's lack of a response but freezes once Near glares at him. With a Near Death Stare™.

"Once again, boys will be boys. State your business and explain why I can't sense any guards around you."

Near drags the chair to in front of her cage and sits, blatantly staring at her.

She could be pretty if she weren't so damn tiny.

"If your business is staring...I could go back to sleeping."

Near sighs and shakes his head.

"My name is Nate River but in times like this, we have to use fake names so I am Near. This is my adoptive brother, Miheal Keehl. But you can call him Mello."

Her head tilts to the left slightly as she contemplates this information slowly.

"I understand. It is a pleasure to meet you, Near. Mello. My quote unquote 'name' is Dawn Brenmanin. But I'd like to be called Day Break."

Near's eyes widen as a gloved hand surfaces from the swath of clothes and tears off the blindfold.

She had star-shaped scars around her left eye which was pure black clashing with the pure silver of the right eye.

"Take a picture..It might not vanish on you."

Mello's mouth flops open as she does just that, reappearing in front of the two of them.

"I'd like to help you but you'd have to trust me. Could you do that?"

Near exchanges a look with Mello as he contemplates exactly what he has to lose.

"Hai."

Day looks slightly surprised before a faint smile flickers into existence.

"First, I'm...Not exactly human. My mother and a Shinigami sacrificed both their lifespans to save me...Before I was to be conceived. The day I was born was the day my mother committed suicide. I am the only person who doesn't need to touch a Death Note to see Shinigami. And can turn into a Shinigami for a short period, turn dead people into Shinigami, and control shadows."

Near nods, not outwardly showing how afraid this makes him. If she became their enemy...She could do more damage than even Kira.

"I have no desire to become Kira. I want to stop this senseless killing...It unsettles me and the other Death Gods. Kira is playing God to things that don't concern him. We need to stop him before it's too late and his 'new world' takes fruitation."

Her tone suggests nothing but pure seriousness.

"You are aware who L is, correct?"

Mello and Near speak in unison;

"Yes."

"Good. I might doubt you seven percent less. Now then..."

She motions for them to come closer to the cage-

Near can't help but resist the urge to rip his hair out in frustration.

He feels so damn trapped.

He can't turn to the internet because he knows instinctively Kira must be monitoring the websites people look up.

And besides what would he look up,

'Help! Kira has erased all of my memories of the past year and I need help taking him down!'?

Even if Kira weren't probably monitoring him right now, his self-appointed 'priests' probably were.

He shakes his head blankly and grabs another black and red dice. He breathes deeply as the increasingly familiar nausea sweeps over him.

The petite girl-an older version of the caged Day, maybe?- nods towards Mello before motioning towards the final warehouse.

"That's where the sensation of unnatural Death is strongest."

Mello shifts nervously before Day shakes her head; handing him a KitKat.

"I don't trust you like that, Mello. You without chocolate is like Ryuuk without an apple. At least Near can't drag his replications al-"

Day glances at his almost finished replica of Big Ben and raises an eyebrow before rolling her eyes.

"You might want to prepare yourself...Kira..He got creative."

Her eyes glow red as she speaks and listens to the low moans of the long-departed.

Day disappears into the shadows as Mello and Near begin to walk towards Warehouse Seven.

"Isn't seven a 'lucky' number?"

Mello asks lowly so only Near can hear.

"It wasn't for them."

Near replies as clangs and shouts from inside indicate Day 'taking care of' the guards. By taking care of, she meant kill or disarm - whichever suited her mood.

"Nor them either. It's safe now."

Near finds himself fascinated by the splatter of blood against her cheek as she motions for them to walk in.

"You knocked them out?"

Day looks at him in slight bemusement.

"Aa. Except for one. He wasn't human. The sight-" Day gestures sardonically to the gruesome deaths; pausing at a man who had taken the liberty to puncture many of his arteries with a pencil before ramming it into his head.

He was still warm...If they had only came earlier-

"Then we would have caught him in the act of doing this. In humans, arteries carry a lot of blood, no?"

Day and Near lock eyes; his own probably showing his anguish while hers look as calm as an icy river.

He looks away first before she pats his shoulder and walks away.

"In this life, it is a sad but necessary crime for idealists to give up their ideals. To these men, I am a monster, you an anarchist and Mello a murderer. We are all of these things but we are also-"

"Heroes."-

Near shakes his head of the memory before another one drags him back under.

"Mello!"

"Miheal!"

He locks eyes with Day as the bulletproof helmet slips lower on his head.

It was more suffocating than ill-fitting at the moment but he had lost contact with Mello's squad so that could just be in his head.

Day nods at him; crouching behind a corner with her silver-starred black gun.

A full forty seconds pass before a man freezes in their steady pace to Kira's headquarters.

Near's eyes widen as the man opens his mouth about to scream.

Everything moves in slow motion as the man begins to shriek bloody murder.

"He's giving away our location!"

Near doesn't know what possesses him to but he grasps the gun in holster and presses it to his head-

Near scrambles to the bathroom; vomiting white liquid and trying to figure out why his head was spinning so damned much.

When the door creaks open, Near has the sudden urge to just kill whoever the person is.

"I'm guessing you feel the after-effects

as well for your bloodlust to be this high, Kira. Near?"

"Nani? I didn't understand that last part."

Day simply looks over Near apprehensively before slumping over in his couch.

"...I missed you."

"What?..."

Her eyes widen slightly; she must think he wouldn't have heard.

"I was talking to your couch."

Blunt. To the point. He-

"You love me? Ha! A Shinigami..."

Day was nose to nose with him; he could smell the alcohol overpowering the darkly aromatic smell of black roses.

"Can't love? Is that what you told Matt?"

She stiffens and he slowly slides the bottle of Jack Daniel's out of her grasp.

"We can't...Love a human..."

He picks her up gently as she continues speaking.

"It hurts when they die, you know?..I could tell that he was going to die...I could tell where he was going to die..I could tell you exactly when he died...If you say you love me, you'll die too...I promise you."

"And I promise you that-"

The present Day was looking at him oddly as she snaps her fingers in his face.

"Seriously? Just because Kira is a-"

"Near? You need to get up! Get up! Stay away! STAY AWAY FROM HIM!"

The hysteria mounting in her voice made him yearn to not be here. Not in Kira's clutches. He longs to tell her that...She was the cure for so many things...And all they needed was her-

"Look up and see the 'Queen of Shinigani' reduced to rags by our great Kami- Kira!"

Near was in the crowd; blending in with the monks to kill the 'priests'...Why hadn't Day wanted him to go out?

He looks up at the widescreen and can only thank luck that the other 'monks' were just as surprised as he was.

Day, brave unbreakable Day, was being held up between two guards in obvious pain with a sword sticking out of her right side.

"Ne, Novice-san, bitch has it coming to her. Don't feel bad - Kira'll just break her pride."

And they were all forced to watch as he did.

First, they brutally tortured her.

The nightmares made sense now.

The fear of drowning in her own bed.

The fear of their accustomed hiding place.

The fear of him...However..Wasn't explained. He didn't want it to be.

They picked her frighteningly limp body off the bloody floor - bloody with her blood - and strapped her to the table.

"The holy...Water's a bit much, don'tcha say?"

A darkly shadowed man with a slender frame steps out and silently orders everyone to leave.

Kira.

"Ki-ra. To what honor do I owe this visit? Come to kill me?"

She was sarcastically hiding her fear.

Kira steps forward and blurs by her bed.

Near suppresses a flinch that meant-

"Who'd you kill?"

"Your adopted grandfather, of course."

"You bastard."

Kira smiles lewdly and Day's body shakes as he injects her with a hypodermic needle.

"Such a shame that you couldn't have joined me when I offered.."

He picks up a scalpel and Day's eyes widen as evidently she tries flinching away.

Near's unconscious fist clenching garners the short attention of an older monk but it's brushed off when the scalpel bites into Day's shirt; revealing her black unmentionables.

"Ohh..."

"Pretty whore, isn't she?"

"I wouldn't mind dying for those."

Near hated his own kind. He hated them. So much.

Kira paws through Day's body; suckling like the monster he was through Day's chest.

"Such a shame you couldn't be my Queen."

Kira pants; trying to get a rise from Day but there is no response.

"But there is no shame in doing this, right? You are mine. No one else's. I'll kill them."

Still no response. She isn't here. She isn't there.

She's gone.

And Kira pulls off his pants and growling; rips himself into her.

She's back.

She's screaming.

She's trying to fight.

She's losing.

He finally solved one puzzle he never wanted to see again.

He moves through ice and stands besides Kira's head priest.

"A message, sire."

"Nani? Spit it out!"

"From SPK. Die."

Blood splattered across Near's face and through the din of screams...He can't bring himself to give a damn.

He killed his first man today; he'd murdered his innocence.

I'm sorry, Day.

"Gomen. What were you saying?"

Day smirks at him and inwardly, he wants to shake her.

'Don't you know what happened? Don't you care?"

"Near. Its a lot to take in...I know. But if they catch us...They take in everything."

"..What do you mean?"

"Near...I'm so sorry for what I'm going to do to you...But my mind isn't strong enough to save both our memories...So I'll put in yours."

"Take my DeathNote. You'll remember where it is..Trust me."

Day's eyes narrow as she takes in Near's horrified position.

"Near?"

"..By everything...Would you mean they want us to remember?"

"What's the point of a game with no opponents?"


End file.
